when you're a little girl i feel that you are made to believe your wedding is the biggest deal of your life, but for all the wrong reasons. it has to be huge. you have to have the perfect dress, the perfect flowers, perfect food...i could keep going. i know that not everyone falls into this deception and i tried so hard not to. it is hard though. our society feeds on this obsession of wedding perfection. you have to fight not to get caught in it.
i probably didn't wear my "dream dress", the flowers were beautiful but simple, the venue was not what I had dreamed of, but i will say the food rocked. that day was huge but only because of the fact that i married a man who i will spend my life with. marriage is sacred, beautiful and intimate. i wanted my wedding to be sacred, beautiful and intimate, and it was to me. it was perfect to me. i truly can't remember ever feeling that happy. my friends and family helped to fill that day with love and happiness for me. there are no words to express how thankful i am for them.
so now i live in branson, missouri. never in my life have i ever wanted to live in branson, missouri. austin is where my heart was. the beautiful hills, the blue lakes, the amazing live music, and just the feel of the city. uhh i love it. instead i live where live music is the dixie stampede, the beautiful hills are covered in snow, the lakes are frozen and where you seriously see hill-billys at wal-mart. i do though live on an island, k-kaua'i to be exact. it is the family camp of kanakuk. i live in a one room, two-bathroom cabana that has one queen bed, bunk beds, and a sofa(that pulls out into a bed!). this might seem horrible to some and honestly i was not excited at first. josh had told me that the people here, seventy other college grads from all over the county, were incredible. i was judgmental and i didn't know if i believed him. God slapped me in the face. i have never been welcomed by anyone like i have by these people. they are beyond incredible. they love people great but love Christ greater. my first week here has been so challenging. i love it and i love the people.
it is so easy to get by on just loving people really well. if this is what you hide behind you miss out greatly in life. you must love the Lord greater. if you our a Christ follower and love his people but don't know His word, don't speak his word, or don't desire for others to know Him you are missing everything. one of the things i have learned during my first week on the island is the depth of the bible and how we desperately need to know it's depths. you could go your whole life loving God deeply and walking with him but if you don't know the depth of his word, you will miss out on so much he desires for you.
i don't want to miss out. i refuse to miss out. i wait eagerly for what the Lord has in store for josh and me. marriage has rocked my little world...in many ways...
