he will left up your head.

ohhh man. life is crazy hard right now. i have to fight giving into self-pity sadness and just fear a lot these days. but as i was in the kitchen getting something to eat i heard "God will left up your head" by jars- it was on their worship cd- because ksbj is still always playing in my parents house. love ksjb but i don't want to listen to them...but i do like this jars song and it came at such a sweet time. i needed to hear that. he will left up your head.

art really is therapy for me. so i have been trying to do more stress releaving activities! here are a few...

this is just a little memory saver from kate's wedding. a pressed flower from my bouqet and one of her cute tags.

i found this old drawer amongst my mother's stuff and she said i could do whatever i wanted. the pink flowers fell off some of the bouqets from my wedding and the rose is another flower from kate's. it is going to go ellis's crib i hope. and yes i am calling her ellis but i don't like elle...that is a popular name now...so i just want it to be ellis...just in case you were wondering...

"love, mimi" that is the name of this group of cards i made. do you think i can sell them?? be honest.

i don't know what i want my "name" to be. i have a stamp that says cate button from my wedding. but i kinda want something more fun. what about peace&buttons...thoughts??









like mrs. lauren johnson i too want to copy some art. i have been wanting to paint something for ellis and i saw this girl on etsy. i love love watercolor and her paintings are just beautiful to me. i will try to attempt this soon...i don't know if mine will turn out as good as lauren's. i might just end up buying it...

unitedthread:
http://www.etsy.com/listing/66449889/blue-owl-and-rose-bramble-archival-print


and just a little pregger update...i have weird, specific cravings. strawberry-pineapple-blueberry smoothies, vanilla frozen yogurt with cookies, greenbeans, baked-potatoes with black beans and salsa, and today was powdered donuts and rootbeer. i rarely drink any sodas and now i'm feeling the sugar...i promise i'm not always that bad. josh was sweet and went and got it for me.

p.s. i know instagram is like old news but i just downloaded it on josh's phone because yes i still have my crap little phone. it is really addiciting. it gives us non-photographer peeps some skill.

life is hard but you know i'm glad it is. it makes me trust him more, more than i would if things felt easy.
peace, love, and powdered donuts.

hey girl come with me and let yourself go

so whenever i found out i was pregnant the first time i was driving by myself listing to a mix-tape/cd (mix-tape sounds cooler)and oar's hey girl came on. i started crying, singing really loud and thinking what if i am having a girl!! it was hard to listen to that song for a little while. but now it brings my heart lots of happiness.

i didn't really get that mother instict with this baby. honestly it is was really hard for me to grasp the fact that a human was growing inside. i felt anything but contected to the baby. but the farther along i got the more of that "feeling" came. first i just wanted it to be a girl and then it was like, no i'm having a girl! i just know it! on monday may 9th we found out that i was right. baby number one for the button's is a girl. i know that hey girl shouldn't really be one that makes me think of my girl but i don't care. it's a good song. here are her little hands and feet. i could of watched her for hours...

some other big news...not really... but i have been trying desperately to make my "high school" room not look high school. the walls are still the dreadful purplish color i thought was a great idea but i've tried decorating it. it's pretty sad but i'm trying. these are just my fav spots right now...

and then my little work artsy station. i hope to move into dalton's room if we plan on staying her when my parents leave. it will give me a bigger space. but for now i'm very happy with this work space.

don't worry i'll keep you updated and hopefully things will start looking cooler. i really can't wait for our one place...
peace out.

i'm baacckkk....

every time i think about me dressed up as anna nicole smith for our senior eco project i laugh out loud...

but yes i'm back. it feels good to be back and not only in the blog scene but in the texas scene. my last blog was last january after i had got married and moved up to branson, mo....wow that was a crazy year. i probably learned more about myself and my God in a year than i could of ever imagined. needless to say it was probably one of the hardest years of my life. and only a little bit had to do with being married or maybe all of it had to do with being married. all i know is that the Lord opened my eyes to a lot of things and i truly feel that my world is now more beautiful. it was hard as hell but i think He does that, through the dark, hard times if you let Him, He will make your world more beautiful.

my year at the Institute was not at all what i thought. first semester my anixety came back and i ended up missing a lot of class. plus i was still working as a barista (yeah i thats right i know how to make really good coffee) and i really was spreading myself thin. but i still learned a ton. i learned old testament history that no one had ever told me about, it blew my mind. that first semester i feel in love with the Word like i had never had.

one of the darkest times of last year for me is when i miscarriaged. i remember days before i found out i was pregnant i was telling God when josh and i should start having kids haha.i wanted to teach for a year or two and then it would be a good time. when i saw "pregnant" on the stick i freaked out. i got really depressed that day, i was just mad at God. telling people got me really excited though. and then God took the baby back up to Him. i've never cried like that. i gave myself probably the worse migraine known to man, josh almost took me to the er. it is really amazing how heartbreak like that brought josh and i closer. i remember taking a shower and just crying out to God to please bless me with another baby. i promised to react better. i almost heard Him say out loud, "cate please trust me. allow me to wow you with what i have in store for you". and He did wow me. a month later during the time where it is either really hard for you to get pregnant after a miscarriage or in my case really easy, He blessed us with another baby. of course i questioned Him again. are you crazy?? we can't have a baby. this isn't the right time. but thankfully He doesn't always listen to us.

two thousand and eleven has been a crazy year. finishing up at school was bittersweet. josh and i were ready for change. ready to be in texas closer to the ones we love. missing out on things going on in the lives of people i didn't want to miss, was harder than i thought. i cried a lot. but the Lord used the Institute to break me and mold me. and that i wouldn't take back, as hard as it really was. now we are back in texas both jobless, baby on the way and living with my parents. haha crazy. God seriously has a sense of humor.

i heard a pastor say, "i think it's so insane that Christians will trust Christ with their eternity but not their today." He just wants us to trust Him with our today. so that is where i'm at.

a button in branson

when you're a little girl i feel that you are made to believe your wedding is the biggest deal of your life, but for all the wrong reasons. it has to be huge. you have to have the perfect dress, the perfect flowers, perfect food...i could keep going. i know that not everyone falls into this deception and i tried so hard not to. it is hard though. our society feeds on this obsession of wedding perfection. you have to fight not to get caught in it.

i probably didn't wear my "dream dress", the flowers were beautiful but simple, the venue was not what I had dreamed of, but i will say the food rocked. that day was huge but only because of the fact that i married a man who i will spend my life with. marriage is sacred, beautiful and intimate. i wanted my wedding to be sacred, beautiful and intimate, and it was to me. it was perfect to me. i truly can't remember ever feeling that happy. my friends and family helped to fill that day with love and happiness for me. there are no words to express how thankful i am for them.

so now i live in branson, missouri. never in my life have i ever wanted to live in branson, missouri. austin is where my heart was. the beautiful hills, the blue lakes, the amazing live music, and just the feel of the city. uhh i love it. instead i live where live music is the dixie stampede, the beautiful hills are covered in snow, the lakes are frozen and where you seriously see hill-billys at wal-mart. i do though live on an island, k-kaua'i to be exact. it is the family camp of kanakuk. i live in a one room, two-bathroom cabana that has one queen bed, bunk beds, and a sofa(that pulls out into a bed!). this might seem horrible to some and honestly i was not excited at first. josh had told me that the people here, seventy other college grads from all over the county, were incredible. i was judgmental and i didn't know if i believed him. God slapped me in the face. i have never been welcomed by anyone like i have by these people. they are beyond incredible. they love people great but love Christ greater. my first week here has been so challenging. i love it and i love the people.

it is so easy to get by on just loving people really well. if this is what you hide behind you miss out greatly in life. you must love the Lord greater. if you our a Christ follower and love his people but don't know His word, don't speak his word, or don't desire for others to know Him you are missing everything. one of the things i have learned during my first week on the island is the depth of the bible and how we desperately need to know it's depths. you could go your whole life loving God deeply and walking with him but if you don't know the depth of his word, you will miss out on so much he desires for you.

i don't want to miss out. i refuse to miss out. i wait eagerly for what the Lord has in store for josh and me. marriage has rocked my little world...in many ways...

i have an obsession.

i feel that there are few things i'm "obsessed" about. if you were to ask my friends what is cate obsessed about they would probably say, mary-kate and ashley, urban outfitters, celebrities and.... magazines. what i have come to find that my true, i have to have obsession is magazines. i realized this fetish last year when i went into the grocery store just to get a couple of things and i found myself feeling the desperate need to buy a magazine. i was like, "whoa cate, you just bought one the other day." i got one anyways.

i love fashion. i love everything about clothes, the way people wear them, and just the artistic creativity that goes into creating them. i think this is the driving force behind my obsession. celebrities have the financial ability to buy clothes constantly, which is why i love looking at them all the time. i have about thirty magazines in my room right now, i did throw away a lot recently. i keep my favorites, some are from 2003.

i get ideas from other people. i flip through magazines, seeing how someone puts something together and it will give me a great idea. i love that fashion and clothes are shared but at the same time you can make it your own. i bet you are dieing to know what my favorite mags are aren't you?? haha just kidding. but i'll tell you anyways...

Nylon- music and fashion truly do go hand and hand, this magazine is a blend of that
ELLE- even though i don't by this one that much (it's expensive) i love sitting in the store and flipping through it
Teen Vogue- i know what your thinking, but i LOVE this magazine- it always has great clips of celebrities and other people on just a regularly day
In Style- thanks to hopes subscription i got hooked
People- i know a lot of these mags are trash and really i hate how the paparazzi treat celebrities, but this one seems to be the classier of them all
boho- this is a relatively new magazine, but i love it because it's green and has really creative was to be organic

ok i won't keep going, but those are just some of my favs.

magazines just make me happy. i think it got it from my mom because when i was little she would always get country living at the store. kate's mom also always had People while we were in middle and high school. some of my favorite dates with josh have been when we would get coffee and go sit in hastings. he would read a book and i would look at magazines. even though i know it can get out of control, like when i'm not paying attention while walking through the store looking through a magazine, i'm ok with my obsession. it is one of my simple pleasures.

so it's been awhile...

so i have decided to start blogging again, since i have some things going on. i must say i have missed it and miss reading other blogs....

being engaged makes you realize how much marriage is going to change you. and usually i don't like saying things "change me", it scares me into thinking i am becoming someone else. i am reading this book called Sacred Marriage and the cover says this statement, "what if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?" this statement alone has already rocked my view of what marriage is all about.

the Lord has really been asking me, "what is going to make you more holy, and make you look more like me??" i feel that we get caught up in "what is going to make me happy??" like we are entitled to so much, when really that is not true. what is going to make me more holy and make me glorify my Lord right now in this phase of life is marriage. and the amazing thing about God is that when you decide to choose holiness over happiness, you are filled with inexpressible joy. i cannot even put into words the joy i feel about marrying josh. i am excited to be changed into a more holy woman.

marriage will change me, and thank God it will.

easter changes everything

sooo i'm about to get kinda deep and its only my third blog but whatevs....
yesterday at my church back in houston, it was one of the best easter sunday sermons. everytime i hear my pastor at bridge point bible church speak, it rocks my world. before we entered into the sanctuary we were given a piece of cardboard, which was different from our usual weekly bullentin. i was immediately intrigued. my pastor held his own bigger piece of cardboard with death on one side and then life on the other. don't worry im not going to go into the entire sermon even though it rocked...
the main thing he wanted to get across is that jesus died and then rose again to life, and that changes everything- if jesus can over come death and sin on a cross, that changes everything. i know this is not an incredible new revelation. but at the end of the sermon my pastor had people from my church come out one by one and show their own pieces of cardboard. on the front they wrote things that were keeping them from truly living free in christ, and on the back what their life looks like now with victory in christ. it was so cool to see the gospel be so real in peoples lives. for people to stand up infront of others they know and dont know and show the gross sin in their lives but then show that it does not end there, it was just such an amazing testimony of who our God is. a man from the sudan got up and showed his piece of cardboard. it said lost boy of the sudan and on the back citizen of the USA and of heaven. it was heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time...so yeah it was just a great beautiful day.
and we also colored eggs which turned out awesome. my mom did all the names.

these were my favorites..